I Finally Have An Unhappy Childhood

It seems that the story of my childhood is not that common. I didn’t have a dysfunctional family; I grew up with loving & supportive parents that gave me every advantage. The both were working professionals & we were lucky enough to have a really nice house, a lake cabin, & cars. We took vacations & visited my grandparents, who were equally as loving. My parents paid for music, dance & art lessons & laid out money for 4 years of private university education. They came to see all my plays & concerts. My parents gave me all the tools to become a model gay man in the new millenium. I have continue to enjoy their good humor & their company.

Last Sunday, my parents forwarded an email with the heading- “Warning!”. The text stated that it was important that everyone watch a Fox News special that would reveal the truth about our President being a Marxist. I should have just deleted it., but I was so outraged & weary of people claiming that Mr. Obama is a Marxist, socialist, Nazi, & foreign born that I fired off a reply that stated “if any of you think that our President is a Marxist, you are truly nutty & probably racist, & if you let Sean Hannity & Fox News make your political decisions for you, then you are not just nutty, you are stupid & lazy… do any of you actually know what Marxism is?.” This set off a series of responses to me from the people in the email group saying mean & hateful things about me & my views. One person said that my response was “typical of someone that acts like a cornered animal”. I would respond with comments such as –“I don’t know why my smart & loving parents would know or associate with people like you”. My parents later emailed & stated that they were hurt & dismayed by the emails & that my father thinks I have called him stupid, my mother has been crying & that I am “tearing apart the fabric of our family”. Now I feel terrible for hurting my parents, but if I am forwarded an email like this, am I not allowed to respond? I apologized to my parents, who have not acknowledged the apology. They are apparently not speaking to me. Now in my deep middle-age, I finally have a dysfunctional family.

Quote Of The Day

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”
Dr. Seuss

A photograph is neither taken nor seized by force. It offers itself up. It is the photo that takes you. One must not take photos.

The title quote is by Henri Cartier-Bresson

Another from my collection:

I was going down for the third time

 My heart was broken,

I was not open to your suggestions

I had so many questions

That you just kissed away

Tell me, I guess that cupid was in disguise

The day you walked in and changed my life,

I think it's amazing,

The way that love can set you free

So now I walk in the midday sun

I never thought that my saviour would come

I think it's amazing

I think it's amazing

 I think you are amazing

George Michael

Great Moments in Advertising #7

What Does He Think Of That?

Now I am quietly waiting for

the catastrophe of my personality

to seem beautiful again,

and interesting, and modern.

The country is grey and

brown and white in trees,

snows and skies of laughter

always diminishing, less funny

not just darker, not just grey.

It may be the coldest day of the year,

what does he think of that?

I mean, what do I do?

And if I do,

perhaps I am myself again.

Mayakovsky by Frank O’Hara from Meditations In An Emergency

Born On This Day- November 18th... Songwriter Johnny Mercer

One hundred years ago today, Johnny Mercer was born in Savannah, Ga., & he grew up to be one of the most popular lyricists of the American Songbook. He was decidedly, not gay, but Johnny Mercer is one my favorite lyricist. He wrote witty, smart, insightful lyrics. Mercer wrote the words, & sometimes the music, for more than 1,500 songs, with more than 200 collaborators, among them composers Harold Arlen, Hoagy Carmichael & Jerome Kern. He was nominated for 18 Academy Awards & won 4. He was the 1st president of the Songwriters Hall Of Fame & the founder of Capitol Records. Mercer was a charming & talented man & a favorite of mine. Here are some of the songs that he supplied the words for:
Hit The Road To Dream Land, Blues In The Night, Skylark, One For My Baby, Ac-Cent-Tchu-Ate the Positive, Dream, Come Rain Or Come Shine, Any Place I Hang My Hat Is Home, Autumn Leaves, Something’s Gotta Give, & Moon River.

Here is Robbie Williams doing the greatest Saloon Song of all time:


It's quarter to three, there's no one in the place except you & me
So, set 'em up, Joe, I got a little story you oughta know
We're drinkin', my friend, to the end of a brief episode
Make it one for my baby & one more for the road


I got the routine, so drop another nickel in the music machine
I'm feelin' so bad, wish you'd make the music pretty & sad
Could tell you a lot, but you've got to be true to your code
So, make it one for my baby & one more for the road


You'd never know it but buddy, I'm a kind of poet
& I got a lot of things to say
& when I'm gloomy, you simply gotta listen to me
Till it's all talked away

Well that's how it goes & Joe...  I know your gettin' pretty anxious to close
So, thanks for the cheer, I hope you didn't mind my bendin' your ear
This torch that I found must be drowned or it soon might explode
So, make it one for my baby and one more for the road
That long, long road

Happy Birthday, RuPaul!

It has been pointed out by some friends & some readers, that my blog is all abut love, love, love. Not always; I can get crabby & I have a long list of things, people, events & behavior that get under my skin... but, I do love drag queens, & I love the Supermodel Of The World- RuPaul. I love her & I love him. I love PuPaul's Drag Race on Logo. I love the music. I truly love the gender-fuck. Happy Birthday, Ru!

Born On This Day- November 17th... Movie Idol Rock Hudson

Leroy (Roy) Harold Scherer, Jr. was born on this day in 1925. Rock Hudson was blessed with the urbane charm, dashing good looks, & virile masculinity of Hollywood's classic matinee idol image. His image & talents were used to great effect romantic comedies, often paired with the equally magnetic Doris Day. One of the most popular movie stars of hisera, Hudson's screen career spanned 5 decades & was a true example of Hollywood's classical "star system" style career promotion. His early success was the result of careful cultivation & nurturing by major movie studio executives. While generally underappreciated for his skills as an actor, Hudson showed unexpected glimmers of brilliance, as in George Stevens' 1956 epic, Giant for which he received an Academy Award nomination. Known for his easy going demeanor off-screen, Hudson was well thought of by colleagues & seemed to enjoy a rich & happy life in the public eye. In truth, Hudson endured a deeply troubled private life, living a lie for the sake of his career, including going along with a studio arranged marriage. Manufactured to be Hollywood's ultimate ladies man, Rock Hudson was a lifelong gay man. It could be claimed that Rock Hudson was one of the greatest actors who ever lived: a gay man who became an international symbol of heterosexuality. In the more open 1970s, Hudson did become more visible in bars & bathhouses on the West Coast, & was even included post-coitally, anonymously but with his blessing, in Armistead Maupin's newspaper serial Tales of the City.

Tragically, after contracting the HIV virus & dying of AIDS in 1985, his private life was thrust public for the world to see. Hudson would become the first major Hollywood casualty of the misunderstood & widely feared disease. Hudson's sex life received detailed attention posthumously when a lover, Marc Christian (who died last week from a drug overdose), whom he had not informed of his diagnosis, successfully sued his estate. But he would not die in vain. His death not only opened people's eyes to the disease itself, it inspired his good friend  Elizabeth Taylor to begin her decadesl ong role as a prominent AIDS activist, raising millions in the fight against the deadly disease that had robbed her friend of his golden years. He was always a favorite of mine & his passing brought me much sadness. I like the frothy comedies, but I most appreciate him in Magnificent Obsession (1954), All That Heaven Allows (1955) & Written on the Wind (1956), which were directed by Hudson's mentor, Douglas Sirk.

Trucks, Love & Videotape

During the period that we lived in the Wallingford neighborhood of Seattle, the Husband & I both drove crazy, funky trucks. The Husband drove a yellow 1950 Ford Pick Up Truck. Oh, he loved that truck! I drove a 1960 Ford Pick Up Truck, & I loved mine also. We both got attention for driving these vehicles, & the husband's truck was featured in a movie (how jealous was I of that truck?!?) We got rid of the 2 trucks in the move to Portland. The Husband sold the 1950 truck to a very enthusiastic buyer & I gave mine to my father to turn into a snowplow (my parents live in rural Eastern Washington). Here I am with my beloved 1960 Ford Pick UP in front of the cottage.

NEVER FACE THE FACTS

I did a post at the end of October, on the birthday of, about my muse- Ruth Gordon. I went on to state that this amazing actor gave me my motto- Never Face The Facts, which is a quote from one of her volumes of memoirs. Yesterday, the Husband, who is a stunningly talented artist, was sifting through his box of images that he uses for his collages & assemblages, & I spotted this page from a magazine article about our house in Seattle. We lived, for 15 years, in this tiny 600 square foot cottage in the Wallingford neighborhood. This house received quite a bit of attention, not just for the design work, but because 2 men & 2 canines were able to live in this tiny space. The house had 2 rooms- The Room & The Other Room. We climbed a ladder to our bedroom built in the rafters of the attached garage (it was the original Boy's Fort). From May-October the cottage increased in square footage, as we moved furniture & rugs to the outdoor rooms that we had created using decks, walkways, lattice & plants. The house had originally been a house boat on Lake Union, & had been brought up the 4 blocks our tiny street & plopped on cinder blocks, to become a "mother-in-law" unit for the manner house owned by our landlords & dear friends- Robert & Margo. This was a happy & productive time for us, & we had wonderful neighbors, who became important friends & major players in our lives. The house was featured in a book- Flea Market Decorating by Merideth Press. It is lovely to have such a gratifying archive from this period. We still have most of this stuff, but in very different configurations. Post Apocalyptic Bohemia is a much different house & a much different life. We are older & changed, but the Husband still provides an interesting, beautiful & provocative place for us to call home. He are some photos (by Mike Jensen) from the book, you can click on any image to enlarge:

Seen At Or Near My Max Train Station

There Is Nothing Like The Greeting From A Dog When You Come Home

I have posted several times about my love of canines. The poor Husband has never had any say so in choosing our dogs. I always just bring them home. He always seems to fall in love. This is Junior. He came to live with us in August 2007, just a week after our most beloved dog- Butch died. I was in such deep & powerful mourning at Butch's passing & I figured another new family member would occupy my time. Junior was found tied to a tree, on a length of rope, in a rural area outside of Portland. All of our dogs have been rescue dogs & they all have had "issues", but Junior is particularly nutty. The Husband has dubbed him "Junie Tunes". Junior is in need of constant attention, but when he is asleep or in repose, he is beyond adorable.

I saw this on the Huffington Post via WickedGayBlog. "We always think about wives, husbands & children of soliders, but we often forget about the pets. They clearly miss their loved ones at war as well. Lt. Schmidt posted this video his dog Gracie greeting him when he came back from Kandahar."

Born On This Day- November 14th... Composer Aaron Copeland

Unlike many gay men of his age, AAron Copland was neither ashamed of or tortured by his sexuality. He apparently understood & accepted it from an early age. Throughout his life he was involved in relationships with other men. His affairs were mostly with younger men, usually musicians or artists, whom he mentored, including composer Leonard Bernstein, dancer & artist Erik Johns, photographer Victor Kraft, & music critic Paul Moor.


Copland was an American composer of concert & film music, as well as an accomplished pianist. Instrumental in forging a distinctly American style of composition, he was widely known as "the dean of American composers". While his orchestral music & his ballets found success on the stages & in the concert halls of America, Aaron Copland sought to enter another arena, the emerging industry of motion pictures. He saw this as both a challenge for his abilities as a composer & an opportunity to expand his reputation & audience. However, the tendency of studios to edit & cut movie scores went against Copland’s desire for creative control over his work. Copland found a kindred spirit in director Lewis Milestone, who recognized the benefits of allowing Copland to supervise his own orchestration & refrained from interfering with his work. This collaboration resulted in the notable film Of Mice and Men (1939) that earned Copland his first nomination for an Academy Award. In a departure from other film scores of the time, Copland’s work largely reflected his own style, instead of borrowing from the late Romantic period. Additionally, he rejected the common practice of using melodies to identify characters with their own personal themes.

His score for William Wyler's 1949 film, The Heiress won an Academy Award. Several themes he created are encapsulated in the suite Music for Movies, & his score for the film adaptation of John Steinbeck's novel The Red Pony was given a suite of its own. This suite was one of Copland's personal favorites. It is difficult to overestimate the influence Copland has had on film music. Virtually every composer who scored for western movies, particularly between 1940 & 1960, was shaped by the style Copland developed.


Copland was awarded the Pulitzer Prize in composition for Appalachian Spring. His scores for Of Mice and Men (1939), Our Town (1940), and The North Star (1943) all received Academy Award nominations, while The Heiress won Best Music in 1949.Copland's best known piece of music is probably Fanfare For the Common Man (1942), a popular choice for opening ceremonies, with its dramatic opening fanfare, & turned into a worldwide pop hit in the 1970s by Emerson, Lake & Palmer. Copland's homosexuality was documented in Howard Pollack's biography, Aaron Copland: The Life and Work of an Uncommon Man. Copland died of Alzheimer's disease & respiratory failure in Sleepy Hallow, New York (now Sleepy Hollow),  December 2, 1990, just weeks after his 100th birthday.

Old Devil Moon

In the summer of 1973, I appeared as OG the leprechaun in Finian’s Rainbow at the Music Tent on Cape Cod. This was just exactly the kind of role that I was best at- a comedic secondary part, with 2 really great, audience pleasing songs & lots of time in the green room. Although this musical has an outstanding score by Burton Lane & Yip Harburg, at the time I thought the book was creaky & the entire enterprise rather twee. The current revival on Broadway, with Cheyenne Jackson, has received rave reviews, especially for the leading man (who is a favorite of mine & who is guest starring on 30 Rock, starting last night). Now I think the book is rather timely, with themes of corporate greed, government bail-outs, home foreclosures & race relations. The score includes a song that I had in repertoire forever- Old Devil Moon. This wonderful, sexy song has been covered by everybody. I would do it in a medley of “Moon Songs”. Here is my man Cheyenne, with the current Broadway version:

Born On This Day... November 13th- Actor Dack Rambo

Norman Dack Rambo was an actor, best known as Jack Ewing on Dallas. He also appeared as Walter Brennan's grandson Jeff in the TV Series The Guns Of Will Sonnett, & as Grant Harrison. Another World. He also starred on All My Children & on the Gunsmoke spin-off, Dirty Sally. He had a twin brother, Dirk Rambo, also a television actor, who died in an auto accident, killed by a drunk driver. After moving to Los Angeles in the 1960s, both Dirk & Dack were discovered by actress Loretta Young & cast in her short-lived CBS series The New Loretta Young Show. He complained about industry prejudice against gay men & said the role he took in 1985 as Jack Ewing on the primetime drama Dallas began to shrink because he was single & suspected of being gay.In 1991, Rambo quit his role in Another World after admitting he was infected with the HIV virus. He said going public with his condition was 'like freedom to me” Rambo campaigned for AIDS awareness until his death in 1994, at age 52, due to complications from AIDS. He is buried with his brother.

Top 10 Karen Walker Quotes

There are so many, but here are some favorites:

"Honey, when you were born, you were born in a gay tree. & then you fell out & hit every gay branch on the way down. & then you fell on top of a gay guy. & then you did him."

“Oh honey, I would, but... I don't want to.”

"Honey, you’re simple, you’re shallow, & you’re a common whore, that’s why we are soul mates”.

"You're sleazy & shameless. I like that, but we're through."

"I had to put him in his place...well...my place."


"Yeah? Well now my drink's talking, & it's saying 'Drink me! I make life more fun! Everyone from a high school kid to a bum on the street knows that.'"


“Honey, I would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick..."

“It's not something you can just run away from like a hotel bill or a crying baby”


“How did you hurt your back? Running away from good taste?”


“Well don't let it get to your head, your hair is already such a disaster that the Red Cross wouldn't give it coffee.”

Happy Birthday To Megan Mullally!

If she had only brought me Karen Walker, Megan Mullally would still have a place in my heart forever. You know during the 8 seasons of Will & Grace, there were times you just wanted to smack the 2 leads for being so annoying? But Jack & Karen? They were never less than hilarious. Megan Mullally, won two Emmy Awards & 3 Golden Globes for her delicious portrayal of Karen Walker. She turns 51 years old today. I think we need a nice big double martini & we can celebrate by watching a compilation of her funny moments from the show:


I first made note of her as a call girl in Risky Business starring Tom Cruise & Rebecca De Mornay. Mullally went on to make a run of guest appearances in various popular sitcoms: Wings, starring Timothy Daly; Seinfeld, Mad About You, Caroline in the City, & 3rd Rock from the Sun. She made her Broadway debut in 1994 in a revival of Grease in the role of Marty, with Rosie O'Donnell & appeared in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying with Matthew Broderick. She is heard in the cast albums of both productions. She opened in her own one-woman show, Sweetheart, in Los Angeles in 1999. The Husband & I saw her in the Seattle try-out of the Mel Brooks musical, Young Frankenstein as Elizabeth, the role made famous by Madeline Kahn in the original film, tough shoes to fill, but we loved her in the role & she has received nearly unanimously outstanding reviews. Mullally is also performs in her own group called The Supreme Music Program. The band has released three albums, The Sweetheart Break-In, Big as a Berry & Free Again!. She also recorded a duet with Carly Simon on the track The Right Thing To Do for the Will & Grace: Let the Music Out! soundtrack. Mullally commented in an interview in The Advocate magazine, "I consider myself bisexual, & my philosophy is, everyone innately is." Mullally dated actor William H. Macy while in college. Her first marriage, in the mid-1990s, was to talent agent Michael Katcher. In 2003, Mullally married actor Nick Offerman (who guest-starred on Will & Grace during its fourth season). She currently lives in West Hollywood, California, with her husband & two poodles, Willa & Elmo. The" industry buzz" about her is that she is super nice.

Blast From The Past

My radio station (I listen in the car) KINK FM 101.9 (it is so funny, my work computer's porn filter won't let me look at KINK's website) is doing their entire catalogue in alphabetical order. This is such a cool, locally owned station & they do their own programming! On any given set you might hear The Clash, Lyle Lovett, & Foo Fighters. I love to listen to KINK & they do good work in the community. This afternoon I had a real blast from the past while driving- Dog & Butterfly. I was never real big on Heart, but I did like them.  Anne & Nancy Wilson are from Seattle. I did many voice-overs at Bad Animals Studio in Seattle's Belltown neighborhood, which they own, & I would see them in the hallway sometimes & be a little star struck .I have worked with Nancy's husband-  director Cameron Crowe in Singles. I always thought they were very cool Bitchin'  Women of Rock n' Roll, & I loved the Dog & Butterfly album. In 1978, I loved to crank it up loud, whenever I heard the single- Dog & Butterfly... just as I did this afternoon, as KINK make their way through the Ds.

Born On This Day- November 11th... Sexy Stanley Tucci

I have been zany for him since the mid-80s, when he had a story arc on 30 Something. He is truly 1 of my favorite actors. This summer, in Julie & Julia, I thought that his Paul's love & adoration for his wife- Julia Child was the glue that made that movie really old together.Sadly, he lost his own wife to cancer around the time of  he release of this lovely film. Although he does well playing adorable, he is a versatile actor, good at comedy & drama. The buzz is that his work as a child murderer in The Lovely Bones (out in December) is a sure Oscar nomination. He wrote & co-directed & starred in Big Night & The Imposters, both of which I loved. Other favorite performances include The Devil Wears Prada (he & Streep just seem to bring out the best in each other), A Midsummer Night's Dream ( an unlikely & very good Puck) & Shall We Dance. The Husband & I both find him to be Yumaliciuos & A+ sexy.

Born On This Day- November 10th... My 80s Fantasy Man Jack Scalia

Yeah, in the 1980s, I had a major thing for actor/model hottie- Jack Scalia. Good to see that he has aged nicely. He turns 59 today. Jack, baby... I want to thank you for all those special times that your photo layouts provided, including that Playgirl spread.

Born On This Day- November 8th... Songbird Sam Sparro

Yesterday evening, we had a yummy dinner at the home of cute, young J & M’s tasteful home. Why these 2 boys want to hang out with a couple of geezers is beyond my comprehension, but we all seem to enjoy each others company. During cocktails J mentioned that the tune- Black & Gold from my September Mix was on continual re-play in his head. I know what he means. This song has been playing at Post Apocalyptic Bohemia for 6 months. I have it in 3 versions; the original, a Basement Jaxx remix & a cover by Katy Perry. It is a very infectiuos song.

Talented hottie Sam Sparro was born in Australia, but moved to L.A. when he was 10, as his gospel musician father found work in the music industry. Sam was a child actor, starting with a McDonald’s Commercial & sang with hos father’s various gospel groups, where he was discovered & championed by Chaka Kahn. He moved back to Sydney as a teen & then to London seeking a career in music. He returned to L.A., working in a coffee shop frequented by industry types. It was a depressing & difficult time for him, but he did manage to write Black & Gold. Sam is currently on tour & is busy promoting his new album. He lives in L.A. with his partner of 3 years- stylist Adrian Gilliland.

"When You Take A Photograph Nothing Is Ever The Same As They Said It Was". Diane Arbus

It is all about the packaging...

"Men Are Only As Loyal As Their Options" Bill Maher

The Husband’s friend, fellow designer & sometime collaborator- the talented & lovely KJ & her husband D, treated us to a delicious & special dinner at Portabella last night. While sipping coffee & sharing dessert, KJ leaned across the table & shared- “your problem, Stephen, is that you fall in love too easily”. I think she was referring to remarks I had written in my blog posts. But wow, is it that transparent? Just last week, I asked the Musical 8 Ball what the future would hold for me, & the answer was Frank Sinatra singing- You Fall In Love Too Easily. This morning I was surmising what sorts of men catch my attention: talented, funny, a bit dangerous… & mature. I am offering 3 men, over 50, who easily hold my attention:

"Ideally, people find mates with whom they can express both their masculine and feminine sides."  Scott Bakula

“`cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run” 

 Bruce Sprinsteen

"New Rule: Politics is about compromises. Really stupid compromises.


That's how we got such laws as... Blacks are 3/5 of a person. Slaves are property, unless they make it to Ohio. Interning the Japanese, but not the Germans. Slaughtering the Indians, but letting the ones who survive run the Keno parlors. Porn, but not hardcore porn. Booze, and then no booze, and then booze again. But no pot. Except medical marijuana. Which is legal to possess, but illegal to obtain. And my favorite; you can't have stem cells, except the ones we already have.
Now in this spirit, I would like to offer a few compromise suggestions for the knotty issue we face today: same sex marriage.
Why not this? It's okay to be gay, if you're already gay, but no new gays. We'll grandfather you in if you're already an organ grinder, but that's it. Or, how about, let gays marry, but come out against gay mortgages?
Or, maybe the answer to this is as plain as the nose in my lap. With both sides so set, one being all for gay marriage, and the other completely against it, how about we just let the lesbians marry?
I mean, come on, marriage is a chick thing, anyway. It is. Monogamy and marriage were invented by women and the church as a way to address female insecurity, and to stamp out oral sex as we know it. And don't give me some line about how two women can't reproduce. As long as David Crosby is alive and can swallow a Viagra, that's not a problem.
Plus, let's face it. When people talk about homosexuality being unnatural, and abomination, they're not talking about the women.
No, no, they're talking about the men. Nobody seems to find anything so abominable about Britney Spears tonguing Madonna. Or Gina Gershon in bed with Jennifer Tilly. Or anything else on the third shelf of my "library."
No, in America, when a man puts something in another man, it had better be a bullet.
So isn't it time both sides compromised a little on this issue? The statistics tell us that anywhere from 2-10% of people in America are gay. Although it seems higher at my bath house.
So look, conservatives, I know you're sincere. I know you think you're doing God's work. But in a hundred years, people traveling by jet pack to Mars are not going to be tripping on gay marriage. The whole issue is just going to be a joke. On you.

So my advice is simple: They're here, they're queer, get bored with it."
Bill Maher

“Unless a picture shocks, it is nothing.” Marcel Duchamp

Getting To Know Me

I have sensitive red-head skin & this autumn I have been vexed by an ugly, painful & persistent rash at my waist. It would almost go away & then return nastier than ever. I went to a specialist last week & was diagnosed as being allergic to nickel. The dermatologist explained that the metal in belt buckles & on the buttons on my jeans was the cause. I have yet to find a suitable stainless steel buckled belt or an alternative. The Husband suggested a piece of rope, but I have never been big on the Jethro Bodine look. I have taken notice that no one in my life seems to bat an eye when I announce- “I can’t seem to keep my pants on”. Why would that be? The rash is gone now.